call me sarah or dad! i’m 18 && fine with whichever pronouns you feel most comfortable with. i’m currently a senior in high school, && i don’t have a plan beyond that. eastern standard time (utc−04:00)































“I got lube on the living room floor and now I’m too tired to clean it up.”
“REMOVE THE PENIS.”
“Do you think bushes feel like they’re getting a haircut or having their limbs cut off when they get trimmed?”
“I wiggle all the time.”
“If you don’t eat ass you’re weak and evolution is coming for you.”
“Dirty jokes and vaguely creeping people out are the only distinguishing features of my personality.”
“I don’t care about the Cold War, it’s just Stalin getting his panties in a twist and America banning the color red.”
“What’s shakin’ bakin’ booty quakin’?”
“My pronouns are butt/butts/buttself.”
“What do you think it’s like to get eaten out by someone with no teeth?”
“You’re a quivering labia.”
“I want to kiss [character]’s nose, because I bet if I did they would crinkle it up and smile real big.”
“Is your puss puss dead?”
“[Character] is a naughty child. I will wiggle their pears.”
“Don’t bully your eyelashes!”
“Am I a bug?”
“People get all worked up about pickles, but I just don’t think they’re that big of a dill.”
“Ask them if they want a daddy.”
“I want to be everybody’s daddy.”
“[Character] and I are having eight children and I’m naming them all Jennifer.”
“You’re gonna get an asshole infection!”
“I’ll spank you with a knife.”
“My siblings used to slide down the roof on a piece of tin and dissect possums. I just stayed inside and read. I’m the lame kid.”
“You look pretty when you cry!”
“I love both of your boobs equally.”
“I’m gonna have a gender reveal party for myself and the cake is gonna be chocolate because I sexually identify as a piece of shit.”
“I draw dicks on people.”
“When I was 11 I bit a chunk out of guys arm through two coats and a long sleeved shirt because he put me in a headlock. He still has the scar.”
“THIS IS A GOD DAMN PUSSY!”
“I like buying things for people, and you’re my favorite people.”
USER ⌜ᵗʳᵃᵍᶦᶜˡʸᵉⁿᵈᶦᶦⁿᵍ⌟
Thomas had let out a sharp gasp before his back arched up and he clutched at John’s hair, tugging gently as the mantras of John’s name went broken and more frantic. “Oh, Oh, JoHN!” He cried out, face scrunched and twisting in pleasure. Pleasure that only John could give him.
a quiet moan was muffled against his skin as john’s lips closed over his clit && he gently sucked. a moment later, he added a second finger. he would be lying if he said that this wasn’t getting to him – his erection was pressed firmly against the mattress, && if he had a little less shame he would have humped it. for now, he would settle for just stroking himself in rhythm to the curling of his fingers inside of thomas.
USER ⌜ᵗʳᵃᵍᶦᶜˡʸᵉⁿᵈᶦᶦⁿᵍ⌟
Thomas let his eyes flutter shut, mouth hanging open as whines and pleads came out. He whined out John’s name like mantra as it slipped easily off his tongue. God, he loved saying his name. It gave him a sense of power, although in this situation he had little to none. “John… John… John! Oh god…” His hands reached up and buried themselves in John’s hair.
confident as he was in his ability, having recieved praise from both abigail && thomas on several occasions, it still lit a fire under him to hear his name gasped out in such a way. his free hand slipped down to palm himself while he lapped away fervently, a pleased hum vibrating in his throat. a finger pressed into jefferson && briefly thrust a few times before curling against his g-spot.
USER ⌜ᵗʳᵃᵍᶦᶜˡʸᵉⁿᵈᶦᶦⁿᵍ⌟
Thomas let out a loud gasp at the teasing licks and bucked his hips. He let out a breathless chuckle as he grinned. “I’m a bittersweet man, john.” He stares up at him. “You however, are just sweet.”
❝—- you’ll make me blush. ❞ &&, unused to kind words, blush he did, though only a faint shade of pink. thank god he could just as easily hide between thomas’ legs. the hand resting against his stomach moved to instead massage his lips with light touches, the tip of john’s tongue circling his clit.
john’s lips pulled into a smirk as he watched the younger man’s face. he relished in every second of this. ❝—- i know. ❞ fingers splayed over jefferson’s stomach as his head dipped once again to mouth over his folds. his tongue darted out, delivering only a few teasing licks before withdrawing. ❝—- for such a bitter man, you taste terribly sweet, ❞ he murmured, chuckling to himself.

normally, ben would never do this. he had enough issues with people assuming that he was friedrich’s son, he didn’t need the risk of anyone catching him wrapped up with an obviously much older man. it was, however, a drawing match – the damn man knew exactly what buttons to push && when to push them. either he spent the rest of the day with an uncomfortable erection, or he allowed friedrich to provide some… alleviating touches. in the end ben opted for the latter, much to the delight of the older man, && allowed himself to be dragged to the car after a moment’s debate on whether or not the parking lot would be more occupied than the men’s bathroom (as if he would ever.) his pants were quickly pulled down around his knees the instant the coast was clear – it would be the only time he was thankful for having to park at the back of the lot – && he melted with far too much ease under the calloused touch. eager lips quickly found von steuben’s, a moan muffled against them, && he wormed closer to huddle into his side.
he doesn’t know what he’s in for, not in the slightest, when his lips find lafayette’s behind locked doors, && not only because he lacks much experience or skill in the bedroom. sex with marie has always been tame, almost alarmingly so. it is strange normally, he thinks, because he is the one meant to be dominant. it is never awful but also not quite satisfying in the way he thinks it should be. louis is simply too aware of the fact that he is aware.
yet, the request comes anyways, in a breath : ❝—- i don’t want you to be gentle. ❞ it’s a quiet protest against the way hands softly cup his body, the tenderness they regard him with. ❝—- i want you to be rough with me. ❞ he takes the marquis’ hands, desperately clutches them to his chest with the plea echoing in his eyes.
❝—- john, ❞ she breathes his name in a plea for him to not stop, hand easing down from where it clutched his bicep to instead place a hand over the fingers working her clit. she needed this, this && so much more. her entire body felt like flames were lapping at her, stroking her to arch into her lover’s chest with a weak gasp. the hand that had balled into a fist around fabric moved instead to his hair, lacing through his locks && pulling him down into a kiss. ❝—- you should see what i look like when i do come, ❞ peggy teases in a mumble against his lips. desperation makes her movements clumsy, but her hips rock against his hand in a shameless display of eagerness for the knot in her stomach to release.